To Live In Harmony It Is Necessary To Add, Not Subtract

I am in that stage of life where half truths, false appearances and interested presences are already tired. In this world, sometimes nurtured by dark days and intermittent people, I want companies that know how to add, not subtract; I want links that will be my illuminated beacon to build a freer, hopeful horizon.

Experts in social psychology and leadership remind us of a feeling that we have all experienced at one time or another. There are people who make an indefinable impact when they enter a room. Sometimes the famous expression “to have light” seems to be authentic, credible. They are presences that for some reason, transmit calm and harmony to us.

This faculty has little magic, it is actually pure psychology, and the process that favors this “emotional permeation” is due to a dimension that is defined as “cognitive awareness. ” That is, the person exercising this positive influence has consciously chosen that state. She is fine with herself, there are no conflicts, there is no resentment, only an inner balance that in turn reaches those around her.

These are undoubtedly personalities who know how to add, profiles that unite scenarios, that make the small environments in which they move flow and that, in general, are very skillful when it comes to “opening their emotional umbrellas” to protect themselves from bad ones. foreign arts, manipulation and guilt-mongers.

We suggest you reflect on it and, above all, learn a strategy from this type of person.

Knowing how to add and live together is to set aside borders

We live in a complex world, in territories endowed with a positive or negative energy charge based on the type of human interaction that takes place every day. We also know that such hackneyed labels are very fashionable, such as the now classic “toxicity or toxic person” , however, beyond these controversial terms there is something that is clear and that we must assume: there will always be behavior profiles that we embitter existence directly or indirectly.

There are people who do not know how to add, we know it, friends, colleagues or relatives who do not understand or will understand that to live together it is not enough just to attend and satisfy their own needs at all costs. It must be said, however, that sometimes, behind the “supposed” toxic person there is a specific problem, such as a hidden depression that undoubtedly requires our sensitivity.

It is therefore necessary to know how to intuit, read between the lines and not instantly resort to that radical frontier where we leave some with their miseries while others, we put on shields and gas masks so that they do not impregnate us with their negativity. Living together also requires knowing how to understand, be empathetic and not put distances without first knowing what the root of the discrepancy is. 

How to develop a healthy and useful cognitive awareness

To create a good impact in our daily contexts and promote that needed cohesion, it is first necessary to “unite” from within, that is, to know what is happening inside us. We must learn to be cognitively aware.

• To add and not subtract, we must not pay attention only to our exterior. It is not just about going with all the goodwill in the world to help, to “like us”, to solve other people’s needs. Who focuses only on the outside neglects himself, and harmony is also lost.

• Therefore, it is necessary to develop an authentic inner calm, to remember what our values ​​are, what our strengths are, always reaffirming our self-esteem as that beacon of light that we must never lose sight of.

• On the other hand, it is also very positive to put into practice an adequate sensory awareness. We must intuit, feel and know how to understand the emotions of others, that world of the senses that often surround us and imprison us.

• The person who knows how to shine, who knows how to add, is capable of understanding and deciphering that emotional world to channel it properly. You will develop an adequate and respectful “emotional detachment” towards those who like to bring conflict, criticism and unfounded bitterness.

• At the same time, he will know how to tune in with the person who camouflages his real needs through that hostility or bad mood where sometimes loneliness, fear or depression lie.

To conclude, true coexistence does not imply creating borders or expatriate in the face of what we do not like or do not understand. It is about creating bridges, respecting different opinions, understanding those who suffer in silence and making those who sometimes fall into a cloud of dark confusion shine.

We will keep the real distance for when they inflict real damage on us. Because in this life, whoever knows how to add is not a captive of anything or anyone;  He is someone free, happy for who he is and who, in turn, is capable of transmitting his well-being to those around him.

Images courtesy of Anna Silivonchik