To Forgive, You First Have To Forgive Yourself

Forgiving is an action for which not everyone is ready. Of course, those who are capable of forgiving others perfectly know the feeling of freedom that invades them when they do so. It is not only an act for the person who offended us, but also for us.

It is necessary to be able to move on, not to drag it like a burden and even sometimes to reestablish a dialogue that gives us answers to questions that have remained with us. Questions that only the person with whom we are resentful can solve us.

On the other hand, many times the damage is not done to us by someone else but rather we are the ones who pull the trigger. Whether deliberately or not, we are ultimately responsible for the injuries and we do not have a reason or want to blame anyone else for what has happened.

Forgive yourself for having failed

When we ask for forgiveness, it is because we have failed someone else or made a mistake so big that other people have been affected. But why do you ask for forgiveness without first forgiving yourself?

On more than one occasion, we leave many of the responsibilities for which only we should be responsible for others. In this case, for example, it is the act of forgiving. A much clearer example would be that of loving. Isn’t it true that if we don’t love ourselves we won’t be able to love someone else? Well, the same happens with the fact of forgiving.

You may wonder why no one has taught you this before, why no one has told you that you have to forgive yourself and then be forgiven by others. The reality is that we have always been taught to be “irresponsible”, in a certain way, with our actions.

For this reason, we allow ourselves to love others without having loved ourselves before, we want them to forgive us without first forgiving ourselves, we demand respect without first respecting ourselves … A long etcetera shows, without a doubt, that we constantly fall into the same mistake, over and over.

Today we want to give you some tips so that you can forgive yourself without fear. So that the next time you find yourself in the need to ask for forgiveness, think of yourself first. Well, it is not selfish to think of you as the first option. You are the most important and, therefore, only you should be the first to ask for your forgiveness.

• Why do you need to forgive yourself ?: You must be clear if you really should forgive yourself, because sometimes we feel guilty without being it. Once you know that you are to blame, you must forgive yourself, but how?
• Failure doesn’t make you a bad person – we all make mistakes, and making mistakes doesn’t make us a bad person. So we must accept our failures, learn from them, and forgive ourselves. We are human beings and we err. It is normal!
• Start over: Sometimes we are afraid to start over, but perhaps this is the first step once you forgive yourself. Think that forgiving yourself is learning, rectifying and realizing where you have failed. From here, a new life will begin for you.
• Forget the past : you may feel tormented by those mistakes that you have made and that are still present in the now. Don’t beat yourself up for it, forgive yourself! and start again. Use all those stones in your path to become a better person.

• Be responsible for your actions : asking for forgiveness, sometimes, is an irresponsible act, since we want to “get rid” of that burden in the easiest way. But if you forgive yourself before, this is no longer so simple. Be responsible for your mistakes, because you have made them!

Now you can forgive others

Now that you know what you must do to forgive yourself before others, you can forgive. Of course, keep in mind that you must always go ahead. More than anything because “forgiveness” is something that is said, currently, lightly. Something that shows how irresponsible we are in our actions.

It is important that you be compassionate to yourself. We all fail at some point in our lives and we all need, at some point, someone else’s forgiveness. But, don’t make this become a constant. Forgiveness of being, has to be sincere.

Also, think that asking yourself for forgiveness will allow you to get to know yourself even more. You will be aware of where you are failing to be able to put a solution to it, you will be able to develop greater self-confidence and you will value yourself more!

Do you ask for forgiveness before forgiving yourself? When was the last time you forgave yourself? We hope that from now on you will put into practice forgiving yourself. An action that will enrich you and that will allow you, later, to ask for a much more sincere and true forgiveness.