Can You Change Your Personality?

We tend to believe that “we are” in a certain way since we are born and that this is impossible to change. However, we have the ability to generate certain changes in our personality and thus transform ourselves into better people or have more bearable relationships. It’s just a matter of committing to yourself.

It is the very language we use that is complicit in this perception of immutability. The verb “to be” acts as a condemnation, because “to be” points to an essence that can always be defined in another way, molded with other edges.

The personality is forged over time

Unlike what we consider, the personality is not a static and immobile entity, but can be shaped according to external stimuli and everything that surrounds us. From the moment we are born, we are incorporating habits, experiences, and even traumas that shape our character.

The truth is that over the years our attitudes are usually always the same -or very similar- and we end up believing that the personality has been branded with fire and, as if it were a tattoo, it is forever.

But we have the possibility to modify the traits that we do not like so much and improve the relationship we have with ourselves and with others. Although it is easier to “move pieces” of the personality when we are children or adolescents, we can also see positive results in adulthood.

Even if you think that “at your age” it is already impossible to change, we recommend that you think twice before believing this statement. The modifications may not be so overwhelming or tangible, but there will be changes, of that you can be sure. Those slight interventions in our character can be those that help us to live happier and to be better people.

Small changes in personality bring us happiness

It is not necessary to suffer from a serious personality disorder to go to therapy and begin to modify our attitudes towards our surroundings. Changes are positive and necessary, we cannot always stay in the same position. Remember the phrase that says “be like the river that flows and does not stagnate” and apply it in your daily life.

Or were you the same person 2, 5 or 10 years ago? And we are not talking about height, weight or experience, nor about studies completed or achievements. Surely, what you liked in your youth is not the same as what you like today or vice versa. So why do we cling to thinking that personality does not change either?

The first step of change

If you have wondered if you can change your personality, it may be because your way of acting or being is ruining your relationships with others or with yourself. You have already taken the first step of wanting to improve… Congratulations! Now begins the stage of asking for help and following advice that you probably do not like but that, ultimately, will help you achieve your mission.

Most people who are in the same situation as you want to change a specific trait of their personality. We are not talking about becoming someone completely opposite to what you were, but about improving those aspects that are not entirely positive.

Your loved ones may have pointed out to you that you are somewhat selfish, that you are easily distracted, that you cannot make proper decisions, or that your lateness is excessive. You already have something to work on!

Dare to modify your personality

All the changes you want to make in your character will take time and effort. It is not a question of “blowing and making bottles”, as the popular saying goes. Nor to get up in the morning and be a different person, but to walk a difficult path, with many obstacles to overcome and situations that will put you to the test.

Be very patient, lean on those you love, be persistent and above all trust in your abilities. This is essential in a company that can be very complicated, which will bring you tears, anger and disappointment. But you have already begun to walk a path towards transformation, improvement and transcendence.